Murphy's Laws

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Murphy's Laws

  • If anything can go wrong, it will.
  • The probability of anything happening is in inverse ratio to its desirability.
  • Nothing is as easy as it looks.
  • Everything takes longer than you think.
  • Work always expands to fill the time available for doing it.
  • Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse.
  • The other line always moves faster.
  • When the plane you are on is late, the plane you want to transfer to is on time.
  • You will remember that you forgot to take out the trash when the garbage truck is two doors away.
  • The chance of the bread falling with the peanut butter-and-jelly side down is directly proportional to the cost of the carpet.
  • Any tool dropped while repairing a car will roll underneath to the exact center.
  • There are two kinds of dirt: a light kind that is attracted to dark objects, and a dark kind that is attracted to light objects.
  • The light at the end of the tunnel is the headlamp of an oncoming train.
  • Inside every small problem is a large problem struggling to get out.
  • Whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.
  • No matter how long or hard you shop for an item, after you've bought it, it will be on sale somewhere else for less.
  • You will never find an article until you replace it.
  • Friends come and go, but enemies accumulate.
  • Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes clear to the bone.
  • People are always promoted to their level of incompetence.
  • It is impossible to make anything foolproof because fools are so ingenious.
  • Washing your car to make it rain doesn't work.
  • Almost anything is easier to get into than out of.
  • An object in motion will be headed in the wrong direction.
  • An object at rest will be in the wrong place.
  • Murphy was an optimist.
  • Author Unknown

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